Entry | January 7, 2011|

If you have been reading my blog for a while now, you have probably figured that it is my journal. As a warning, this is one of those posts.

I don't know if everyone is this way, but as I am going about my day, doing whatever it is that I am doing, my mind is constantly going. Planning this, planning that, figuring out if I do this, then what will happen down the road, replaying events, imagining projects I want to do. I am convinced that this is both a curse and a blessing. A few weeks ago, I was going about my day as I had a passing thought. One of a thousand. "There are times when I want to clear my mind of thoughts I don't want to dwell on. I have been taught my entire life that if you want to get rid of bad thoughts, learn the words to a hymn, and sing the hymn to replace the negative thoughts with uplifting ones. I don't have a specific hymn that I sing, I want to pick a hymn and use it as well as this method." Since it was a thought, it didn't come in exact sentence form. Because if it did, it would have taken up much more of my time. It came as more of a concept all at once. It was fleeting.

About a week later, I woke up with a hymn playing over and over in my head. I always wake up with a song in my head. Always a different song. I have concluded that the song I am singing when I wake up has a source- Whatever song is playing on Brad's alarm when it goes off about 45 minutes earlier. For years, it has always been a country song. This was the first time it had ever been a hymn. As I became cognisent of this hymn I was singing, I remembered my fleeting thought from the week before. Is it possible that this is an answer to a prayer that I never actually prayed. A conversation, I thought the original thought, and God commented back with the follow up thought. Yes. I am so grateful for the blessings I receive and the way they help me navigate through life. The hymn that I was singing- "Sweet hour of Prayer."

This is what made me think of this experience. Last week, as I told my mom, I was in a funk. Starting Monday, I woke up feeling weird. It wasn't my environment. The kids were home, and my life was organized to the point that I was able to enjoy having them. They were getting along great, and helping me out a ton. We were having lots of quality time together, but still, I felt weird. It was an internal, hormonal perhaps, weird funk. I couldn't quite shake it. I kept trying. Gradually, I felt better and better. Even this morning I could tell I wasn't quite myself. Then, I decided to say another prayer. I found myself talking to God, telling him about things and what I was thinking. I asked for a few specific helps. And when I got up, I felt better. Back to myself. Ready for my day. Then, I remembered that hymn.

Sweet hour of prayer! sweet hour of prayer!

That calls me from a world of care,

And bids me at my Father's throne

Make all my wants and wishes known.

In seasons of distress and grief,

My soul has often found relief,

And oft escaped the tempter's snare

By thy return, sweet hour of prayer!

I have found recently that my prayers are answered so freely. My take home lesson is this. The Lord answers my prayers. I can pray for what I need, and then let it go. Not worry about it anymore, turn it over to the Lord and have faith it will be taken care of. (After I have done my part.) Also, Prayer is a form of relief. Use it!

SO, I'm off to enjoy being myself =0).